In an age where oversharing and public scrutiny are the norm, the values of privacy, privilege, and autonomy have become more essential than ever. Privacy and autonomy do not signify secrecy for its own sake; rather, they foster an environment where individuals can grow authentically, free from judgment or interference. Minding one’s own business is not an act of indifference; it is a choice to respect personal boundaries, thereby allowing others the freedom to live on their terms. When we honor these principles, we create space for empathy, self-respect, and authentic connection, rather than letting our lives be consumed by the need to control or police others.

Brené Brown, in Braving the Wilderness, captures the essence of this notion, arguing that empathy and understanding are at the core of real human connection. She writes, “People are hard to hate close up. Move in” (Brown 36). Brown’s insight highlights that judgment or interference in others’ lives often arises from a lack of closeness and curiosity. Rather than seeking to control or judge, we are called to focus on our own journey and show respect and curiosity toward others’ choices. By choosing not to police others and instead practicing compassion, we build relationships grounded in genuine empathy. This shift in perspective allows us to focus on personal integrity, showing that we value autonomy both for ourselves and for others.

Privacy as a form of autonomy is especially significant within spiritual practices, where sacred beliefs and experiences often require protection from public scrutiny. Doreen Valiente, a foundational figure in modern Witchcraft, emphasizes this need for discretion, writing, “Witchcraft is a mystery, and a mystery must be experienced before it can be understood” (Valiente 8). Her words reflect the importance of respecting the sacred boundaries within the Craft, not for the sake of exclusion but to honor the sanctity of these practices. Valiente’s approach is a reminder that by preserving what is most personal, we create space for deepened self-understanding and respect for the beliefs of others.

Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön further illustrates this notion of personal boundaries in the context of mindfulness and compassion. In When Things Fall Apart, she explains, “The more we fully invest in the present, the more we can reveal the boundaries that are necessary” (Chödrön 23). Chödrön suggests that maintaining boundaries allows us to stay present and genuine, enabling us to honor both our inner lives and the lives of those around us. In this way, boundaries serve as an essential aspect of authentic relationships, making space for empathy while protecting our autonomy.

The idea of “mystery” and “revelation” takes on special meaning in spiritual and esoteric traditions. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a “mystery” is “a religious or spiritual truth that is beyond human understanding,” while to “reveal” is “to make known that which was previously hidden” (Oxford English Dictionary). The balance of mystery and revelation is at the heart of many spiritual practices.

Maxine Sanders, a founder and Elder of Alexandrian Witchcraft, has famously stated, “Protect the mysteries, reveal them constantly.” Sanders’ statement reflects the paradox of revealing spiritual truths without diminishing their sacredness. In traditions that hold certain knowledge as privileged, practitioners are called to be mindful of what they reveal to ensure that the mystery remains respected and intact. Revealing aspects of the mystery must be done with a balance of respect, humility, and responsibility, upholding the integrity of what remains hidden.

The Villa of the Mysteries in Pompeii is an excellent illustration of this balance between revelation and secrecy. The villa’s frescoes depict a religious initiation ceremony, likely dedicated to the cult of Dionysus, and these paintings offer a window into ancient spiritual practices. Yet, despite the detailed depictions, the exact nature of the ritual remains unknown. The frescoes reveal glimpses of the sacred rites while concealing their complete significance. As one scholarly source states, “The Villa of the Mysteries is a complex site where private ritual knowledge is visually transmitted, though its full meaning remains inscrutable” (Müller, “Mystery Cults and Visual Rhetoric”). Just as Valiente speaks to the “experience” needed to understand Witchcraft’s mysteries, the Villa of the Mysteries shows that some aspects of spirituality remain beyond intellectual understanding, preserved through the personal experience and respect of practitioners.

Furthermore, this idea connects to the obligation within any tradition that holds certain teachings as private or sacred. While practitioners may interpret their experiences personally, they also bear a responsibility to respect the community’s boundaries around what may or may not be shared. In traditions such as Witchcraft, this means understanding that while individual interpretations are valuable, they exist within the context of a larger community that entrusts certain aspects of its knowledge to secrecy. Valiente’s point about Witchcraft’s mysteries (requiring experience to understand) highlights the importance of respecting the sanctity of these teachings. For practitioners, this respect involves balancing personal interpretation with the tradition’s collective integrity, allowing room for both individual growth and preservation of the shared mystery.

Ultimately, privacy, privilege, and autonomy are interwoven with respect—respect for ourselves, for others, and for what is sacred. Minding our own business is a conscious decision to protect both our own inner lives and the freedom of others, refraining from judgment and allowing for a diversity of personal truths.

As Brown, Valiente, Chödrön, and Sanders each reveal, these boundaries do not hinder connection; rather, they allow us to engage more authentically and compassionately. Privacy and autonomy enable us to connect with others from a place of understanding and integrity, creating relationships that honor the dignity and mysteries of all involved.

Works Cited

• Brown, Brené. Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone. Random House, 2017.

• Chödrön, Pema. When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times. Shambhala Publications, 1997.

• Müller, Wolfgang. “Mystery Cults and Visual Rhetoric: The Case of the Villa of the Mysteries.” Journal of Ancient Art and Archaeology, vol. 21, no. 4, 2015, pp. 88-102. JSTOR, http://www.jstor.org/stable/23445567.

• Oxford English Dictionary. Oxford University Press, 2024.

• Valiente, Doreen. Witchcraft for Tomorrow. Robert Hale Ltd, 1978.